


but level, in time

by smithens



Series: you will not take my heart, alive [3]
Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Domestic Bliss, In Media Res, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Canon, World War II
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:07:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22136032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smithens/pseuds/smithens
Summary: In 1930, everything changes.In 1939, everything changes again.
Relationships: Thomas Barrow/Richard Ellis
Series: you will not take my heart, alive [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1589362
Comments: 15
Kudos: 133





	but level, in time

**Author's Note:**

> the first chapter serves as both an **epilogue to[you will not take my heart, alive](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20885519)** (required reading) and a **prologue to[but level, in time](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22136032)** (the fic you are currently reading).

## 1930

SPRING

"Milady," he says, doing his best to stay composed, because an outburst would ruin any chance he has here of negotiation, and he's getting the impression that there's very little of that to begin with, "obviously I'll, er, accept your decision, but if I may, it's not exactly an easy time to find work at the moment — "

"No," Lady Mary replies, frowning. "No, it isn't. But need I remind you it is hardly an easy time to be an employer, either."

Well. 

He tried. Thomas tries to smile at her, tries to be deferential, but he's gritting his teeth. 

Should've jumped ship four months ago when he'd first thought to — at least then this would be on his own terms.

"And so I have a proposal for you, Barrow. I am not going to insult you by asking that you stay on to fill a different role; I know you, and I know that you would hate it."

He's pretty sure he'd hate being without a job more, though. Just a hunch he has.

"I've arranged for you to have a pension for the year."

Thomas blinks.

"That's… very generous, your Ladyship, thank you."

It is. He didn't see it coming. Really, it's probably the bare minimum he ought to want for, under the circumstances, but he knows she doesn't like him as much as she could.

He also knows that money's probably just been freed up, given Carson and all.

She purses her lips. "Perhaps longer, if we can manage it, but... well. It's my understanding that you'll likely move to York, Barrow, is that correct?"

Everything always an open secret.

"Yes, your Ladyship, I suppose it is."

"And given that you'll be so near, I should like to propose that — if you find work which allows it — we bring you on again for, for special events, dinners, parties, when the children are home, and the like. Not holidays, I shan't ask that of you, but perhaps several times per year."

Whoever the new hire jack-of-all-trades is might find that insulting, but if he could deal with it for five years, then the new man can, too.

He probably wouldn't do it if it weren't for _when the children are home_ , and he'd bet a large sum that Lady Mary knows that.

If he had a large sum, which he doesn't, and seeing as he's being laid off after, funnily enough, exactly twenty years of service to this house, he is _probably_ not going to come into one any time soon, although that would _really_ be lovely…

It _is_ an offer.

Twenty years is half his life, and he is very attached to those children.

"As you said, milady, if I find work which allows it, I… I would find that agreeable."

SUMMER

He doesn't have much in the way of material belongings to move, given he's spent the last twenty years with room and furnishings accounted for. The main thing is making sure they've each got enough space in the wardrobe, but it works out eventually.

When the last suitjacket is on a hanger, Richard wraps his arms around him, surprises him with a kiss to his neck.

"Welcome home, Mr Barrow."

And it may be ten in the morning, but it's a Saturday, the best one they've ever had, so no one could really blame them for getting back into bed.

AUTUMN

"...and the second one's at the hospital. Just an orderly, transport, that sort of thing, and it'll be long hours, but I'd have a few days free for Downton every week, if I needed it."

"Sounds like an excellent opportunity," says Richard. 

Thomas gets up to do his tie for him, just because he can — they've fallen into little habits like that, little things that say _I love you_ without having to actually open their mouths. "Wouldn't always have Saturday and Sunday off, though." 

"I'm sure we could manage." 

They finish dressing.

At the door, Richard kisses his cheek, says, "good luck."

"Sure I'll need it."

Richard smiles. "Not as much as you think you will."

*

"Never married?"

"No, sir."

"May I ask why?"

He's prepared for this, come up with a self-serving bend in the truth to give. Well, it's a flat lie, really, but not one he could ever get caught in, he's pretty sure.

Thomas turns his hat in his hands and stares at his lap, bites his lips like he could cry.

"Could never bear to, after —" He swallows. "Beg your pardon. To be frank, sir, there was someone, back when I was a boy, and we gave our word for… for after the war. But the flu — "

"Please, please, Mr Barrow, forgive me for asking."

Well. That went even better than he imagined it would.

Learned from the best, he supposes.

*

"You didn't," says Richard at dinner, and his face is a mix of disapproval and amusement.

"Mind you, it did get me the job."

"Christ, I... _Thomas_..." 

Thomas looks up from his asparagus. Richard is clearly trying to think of something to say and falling short.

"What, like you wouldn't've done the exact same?"

"That's not — that's hardly the point," _yeah, because we both know you would've, and with a far more elaborate story to boot,_ but he's laughing. "I suppose I can't well call you a rascal when you're coming up on forty, now, can I?"

Bloody hell.

Forty. 

## 1937

SUMMER

"It's ten years ago today, you know."

He doesn't want to get out of bed.

There's sunlight seeping through the curtains, it's comfortably warm, and Richard looks so _handsome_ , lying next to him, half in gold and half in shadow. 

And, well. 

It's a special occasion, isn't it. 

"Really?" 

"You forget?"

"How in God's name could I possibly forget it's been an entire decade since you were _arrested_ for _gross indecency_?"

Thomas elbows him.

Richard takes the opportunity to roll over and kiss him senseless; when they part, he teases, " _silly boy_ — "

…and Thomas buries his face into the pillow.


End file.
